Not many people know that I have depression; it isn't exactly something one advertises. To my boyfriend I show it in the form of asking to get away for the weekend, while to others I don't show it at all. There is this terrible stigma that everyone who has depression or is in a bit of a down moment is 10 seconds away from downing a bottle of sleeping pills. False; we just want to be calm. We want to be able to sit down and find the beauty or the fun in something; anything, because it is there, you just can't touch it, or be apart of it for that matter.
I am hoping that not too far from now I can climb out of this hole and find the beauty once more. More than anything however, I want a new beginning. A new town with new friends; a new home with new places to explore. Just a place I can go where nobody knows me or has had a chance to be disappointed by me.
To everyone else who has a black dog, I want you to know that you are not alone. Maybe someday soon when my dog is not so vicious we can get together and talk about all the things that make us happy in this world.